Ramblings of a Crazy
by MysticOmega
Summary: People say that crazy people don't make sense. I beg to differ, but then again I might be just a tad biased. [ShizNat. In a way.]


**Mystic: **-pokes ground- I SHOULD be writing the next chapter of LoaS and I SHOULD be doing my homework, but I'm baaaaaaaaad. XD I wanted to do this one-shot first. I wouldn't get out of my head.

**Inspiration: **Talking about crazy people with centauri2002.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Mai HiME or any of it's characters. Sunrise does. Nor do I own the lyrics of Where'd You Go? Located beneath this disclaimer. Fort Minor owns that song.

* * *

_Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home..._

* * *

A normal person is one who makes sense right? One who reacts in a way that life expects them to? Perhaps this is why normal people consider some people crazy. Yet I find it odd that they say crazy people make no sense.

Oh the contrary, I beg to differ. Crazy people or those with mental issues if you prefer, make far more sense than those who are considered "normal."

Without society's restrictions and life's expectations, we can say the truth many times more than a regular person ever would. See we're not afraid to hurt others' feelings and thus, we can tell the truth. Brutal honesty is what some call it. "That's crazy!" is what the ones in denial labels it. It irks me a little that we should be called crazy when all we're doing is ridding ourselves of life's cage and finally embracing true freedom, finally embracing that this life is damned and so we shouldn't have to live up to its expectations.

Ara, am I confusing you with the term "we"? Oh don't jump to conclusions; I don't have a split personality. No, that's the nice black-haired man down the corridor, in the other cell. I think his name is Reito, but I'm not quite sure. We don't get to talk much since he needs his pills every six hours and I must be stuck in this cell the majority of the day. Ah, but what a beautiful day it is today! The sun is shining and I think I hear birds, but I can't turn my head to see. These chains are rather restricting.

Oh forgive me, I'm rambling aren't I? Back to the point, we means all of us. All the freed people or if you're a normal person, all the crazies in this building. I think they called it an asylum. I'm never quite sure of that either. I've heard some of the grouchy people in white coats call it a mental hospital. However I prefer the word home. It is quite homely if you've lived here as long as I have.

Oh dear I've gotten off the subject again haven't I? Well no matter, I'll explain it again. Now what was it again? Oh yes, crazy people make more sense than normal people. Considering that we're not afraid to hurt other people's feelings we can say "Go kill yourself," much easier than a normal person would. After all it's easy to tell that's what many people want. To go kill themselves to escape life and restrictions without turning crazy. Shame that suicidal people are labeled crazy after their death. It makes all their hard work in vain.

Oh rambling again, forgive me. Yes, yes, one of society's restrictions is fear. So without that fear truth is but a mouth's movement away. I can even say I'm crazy while giggling! It's true and I know it. I'm not afraid anymore. I don't have to engross myself in the lies that life has in order to protect one's own feelings.

I say I'm rather happy that I don't have to lie anymore. I can finally relinquish control and accept the fact that with honesty comes mental divergence. It helps that I'm no longer afraid of life. See, normal people are so scared of life that they think they have to be careful when speaking with others, lying to keep the other happy so they won't get stabbed in a fit of rage. It's quite amusing to see their conversations teeter on the edge and it brings a smile to my face. Although the white coats call my smile a "maniacal grin". Really, how rude.

If Daddy was here, he'd give them a lecture on manners and etiquette. Oh, but Daddy isn't here anymore. No, he left a long time ago because he couldn't stay. My last memory of him was quite precious and at the same time rather shattering. I got to hug him one last time and tell him I loved him. Although the blood spilling from his wounds and drenching the carpet were most certainly foul images.

I didn't even get to see Daddy sleep for eternity after that. Nor did I get to see the man who shot Daddy go to jail. The men with shiny badges gave me to the white coats soon after I started rambling after shaking Daddy's body so many times.

Ara I've gotten off the subject again! How careless of me. The music is rather distracting and so is her presence. Although both are certainly calming, especially her eyes and the piano notes in the background.

She's always here, day to day. I think it makes her happy to see me, but it makes her a little sad too. I suppose the glass wall between us is a reminder for her that, thanks to life, I'm not "normal" and I'm also a "threat to society."

It hurts her and makes her sad when I'm called that, I can tell. Though in a way it's true. I am a threat because if I could break out of these chains I would rip out the person's heart who made her cry. I don't like to see Natsuki cry. She is so much more beautiful with a smile on her face. Her eyes shine in a way that make them look like finely cut emeralds and her lips curl up so nicely that it makes me want to kiss her just so I can feel the radiance of her smile.

Oh dear, someone called her crazy for standing at my cell for so long. She's crying now, placing her hand to her face to hide those diamond tears. I want to kiss those tears away as much as I want to kiss her smile. A guardian angel like her should be treated with respect and should be cherished. Alas, life dictates that those that show a sign of mental divergence should be treated in a rude manner.

"Don't cry Natsuki."

Ara she looked my way! How cute her surprised face looks! There, a grin for her tears. I don't like to see Natsuki sad. Her voice sounds beautiful when she laughs a little. The little smile on her face and that little laugh will have to do. For now.

Oh, silly me I rambled and strove off the subject. But then what can people expect from me? I am, after all, crazy.

**--xxxXXXxxx--**

The lone figure stood there with her hands in the pockets of the long white coat she wore. The metal chair she had brought to sit down was currently empty, save for the radio continuously playing a song. It was the one thing that kept the woman in the cell calm, well aside of her presence.

Natsuki smiled slightly and placed one hand on the glass, green eyes watching the taller woman in the cell. Shizuru swung lightly from side to side, her form dangling in the air from the chains wrapped around her body. The iron binds stretched and attached to the white walls, easily suspending the chestnut-haired woman in the air. Sunlight streamed from the single window, spraying the gray jumpsuit with golden rays.

Silky strands of cobalt hair spilled over the thick glass as Natsuki placed her forehead against the wall, eyes watching the older woman. The song reached a higher note and the doctor saw her dear friend close her eyes, as if enjoying the notes.

How many years had it been? Four, seven, ten? She wasn't sure anymore. It felt like a whole other lifetime when she hadn't seen Shizuru in chains and in a mental hospital. Emeralds eyes traveled up and stared at the high cheekbones of the older woman. At least the staff had inserted a window. It highlighted Shizuru's alabaster skin and crimson eyes. It made her condition less dreary. Briefly, Natsuki wondered what Shizuru was thinking. The brunette tended to stay quiet during her visits and it was rare to get an entire conversation out of her. So unlike the girl she grew up with. A girl who used to fill their time with words and affectionate touches.

_But that was before her father was murdered and before they put her in this hellhole. _

Her smile turned bitter. Natsuki remembered that day clearly. It had been a day after school. They had just gone their separate ways when she heard gunshots and a scream. She had come running to see Shizuru shaking her father, screaming and crying for him to wake up. Her friend had broke down after that, rambling that she loved him, that she didn't want him to leave, hugging his bloodied body close to her small one.

It broke her heart when the police came and tore the young girl from her father's corpse. Natsuki bit her lip and rapped her knuckles against the glass door, keeping in time with the music. Footsteps behind her made her turn away from the scene.

"Dr. Kuga?" One of the young wardens asked, blinking at her questioningly. She guessed it was rather odd to see someone like her spend all her time standing at a patient's cell. "What are you doing?" The young man asked, his dark eyes flickering over to the brunette and then back to the cobalt-haired woman.

Natsuki turned away, uninterested. "I'm watching for signs of improvement." She said curtly, keeping her green eyes trained on the swinging patient. She could feel his eyes on her and she could see him shaking his head. Her trained ears caught a snort and a mumbled word.

"Crazy doctor."

Natsuki felt her eyes sting at the careless gesture. She blinked rapidly as the footsteps died away. Her heart throbbed in her chest, beating against her ribcage like the music on the radio.

_They called her crazy too, but can you really blame her? Anyone would lose their mind after seeing someone shot before their eyes. Shizuru are you really that far away from me now? This glass continues to separate us and it hurts. _

An ivory hand reached up and covered the viridian pools. Diamond tears leaked out and spilled over the woman's cheeks, dropping onto the floor soundlessly. Her shoulders shook slightly and she sniffed.

"Don't cry Natsuki."

Emerald orbs snapped open and Natsuki jerked her face up, a surprised look upon her. Shizuru was gazing straight at her. Crimson eyes twinkled when the brunette saw she had caught the young doctor's attention. A grin curled up behind the face mask Shizuru wore. Natsuki chuckled through her tears, remembering the time when the staff had to strap the mask on. Shizuru had complained about the chains being itchy and had tried to gnaw them off with her teeth. Needless to say the brunette had sulked and refused to talk for the rest of the day after she got the mask.

Natsuki smiled when she saw Shizuru's grin widened. "Silly Shizuru." The woman whispered, pressing her forehead and waving a bit at the brunette. Shizuru merely hummed in reply and continued to swing back and forth.

_Even if she's stuck in this hellhole, at least in some way I can be with her.  
_

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**Mystic: **Well, there you have it. My lame attempt at a one-shot filled with crazy people. Twas fun writing a crazy Shizuru. Also, this an AU if you've haven't already guessed. _  
_


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